What Christmas Means to Me...

I love Christmas. The lights, the music, the snow, the decorations, the gifts and even secretly find enormous lawn blow-ups strangely endearing. Like a little kid I start thinking about Christmas way before I probably should. I love giving gifts and have a hard time waiting to give presents. Growing up my parents always tried hard to make Christmas a special day. We would build up to the main event with weekly advent readings and had several traditions that I plan to carry on with my own children.

This year for me, Christmas is different and more meaningful than ever. This year I get to celebrate Christmas as a mom. As I wrapped presents for Ben and wrote on the tag, "from mommy and daddy" I started to think about what a gift Ben is to us which made me reflect on what a gift God gave us on the first Christmas. I don't think that it ever really hit me until I became a mom, the power of the gift. I never knew the kind of love that I could have for someone until Ben was born. A love that isn't always explainable in the midst of sleepless nights and poopy diapers but a love that will do anything to protect my little gift from harm. If I love Ben this much how much more does God love us? I don't always do things that make God smile and laugh or even make him proud, but yet He still loves me unconditionally. I want to give Ben the world. God gave us the world when He gave us His son, a perfect little baby that He watched grow and change in the same ways we've watched Ben. Ever since that first day when I held my little miracle in my arms I've had a little glimpse of what God wants and feels for us.

Tomorrow morning we will open presents, I will enjoy helping my little guy unwrap his gifts but most importantly I will embrace the gift that God gave to us thousands of years ago.